of camp, shopping, and fun times
everyone's going to do a recount of what happened in camp. so if you're looking for that, search elsewhere. but you could always ask me for sermon notes! [: haha. but this year's camp was different. i guess it's cos this camp was a camp where God moved mightily, and i mean it. but you had to want to catch and meet God, or He'll pass you by. it's not like previous camps where His Presence is just so real and you get swept away even if you aren't serious. you can still go away feeling that spiritual high. but this year, i just felt that we had to press in for what we wanted, and that was what the pastors felt too. how much God touches you depends on how much you are willing to press in. it highlights the importance of going into camp, or any other service for that matter, prayed up and with an expectation.
Lord I thirst for You
I long to be in Your Presence
My soul will wait on You
Father draw me nearer
Draw me nearer
To the beauty of Your Holiness
I will wait on You
Almighty God
In the beauty of Your Holiness
I will worship You
Almighty God
In the beauty of Your Holiness
i like the old songs we sing in camp. those are the songs that mean more to me than any catchy song we sing now ever will. those are songs i sing in tawg. yeahh.
went shopping on friday with tim and bronson. took ages just to find a jacket. rahh. i'm getting my shirt on sunday. pricey stuff though, and just for a single event. well, maybe for prom next time? -shrugs. met jeann and rachael after that. they were going around stores asking if they could leave publicity for the vday event thing, so we tagged along. jeann and i left at 5.30pm, leaving bronson and rachael to ermm, continue that noble task. haha.
went back, changed and went to wenguang's place cos of gideon's party. weirdness. ended up going to play lan. hahaha. morphling's imba. oh well. went back, watched movies, went home. nothing much for me to say anyway.
and this is where the light ends.
let's ponder over the question of identity, shall we? who are you? who am i to you? bet you wished you knew who you were to me. yes. who are you. who in oblivion are you? start looking at yourself, before you start thinking everything around you is flawed. look in the mirror and see the cracks in your character and in your soul. you claim to expect so little, and you're not getting it; truth is you are getting more than that, yet you do not treasure it. you whine and complain about the times where it is in lack, yet you do not cherish the times when you have it. you claim to seek your dues, yet, i do wonder whether you do deserve it at times. you. who are you really. oh, and really. stop using me. you think my name's really great? you think it's better forging your identity off mine? you think that by claiming you are so and so's _____ you'll get far in life? stop using me. really. stop trying to impress. you make me sick. you're hanging on for all the wrong reasons; your very goals are in direct conflict with who i am, yet you have the nerve to link your idiocy back to me. i'm definitely not coming from a higher than thou point of view, and i'm not trying to make you be me, so stop thinking that i'm imposing what i want on you. i do not believe in forcing people to go a certain way. i want what's best (or what i believe is best, for i am only human and i can be wrong) but if you don't want it, you're free to walk your own road. but do not border the two distinctions and try to have the best of both worlds. you do not bear my mark. stop dragging me into your self-destruction and desolation. as of now, you have absolutely no association with me. i'm sick of you. really. but of course, i will give what i owe. 35 pushups, was it not? i'll double that in your face, and then it's goodbye. you've been harping upon it, insisting it shows your superior strength compared to mine. you think you're that good. okay, so you have more physical tolerance (i will not mention i went for a workout prior to that, cos you will choose to neglect that), but can you do 7.58 minutes for your 2.4km? have you raised anyone under you to become an sp? do i ever diss you about how slow you are or how ineffective you are? i don't. cos i know i'm blessed in areas, and i lack in certain areas. what sets me apart is that i know in my weakness His Strength will show. you don't. you hide and lie and convince everyone you're perfect. you paint that perfect picture of yourself, yet when you break, you want the entire world to pity you. you want the glory without the labour. you're everything i stand against. you've worn me out, and i'm tired of trying to be there already. come back if you're serious, if not you're free to live your life the way you do. i'm not going to find you; you come back because you know you're going down a road which i will not. you pull yourself out of the pits you fall into; i will no longer do so.
this is goodbye.
the mass exodus begins...
12:27 AM
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